Parent Actions that Inspire Learners to Become Independent
Check out this video from our head of school, Dr. Tyler Thigpen, as well as quotes from experienced parents of self-directed learners.
Via Hundred
What parent actions empower children to become independent learners?
Quotes from parents and caregivers
Our check-ins with our learner seem to be helping. We are learning to ask questions about where she is with Khan, her badge plan, etc. This is somewhat new to us. We [used to ask] questions about her grades, etc…but she has a different level of responsibility for her education now. As she is much more of an independent learner, the check-ins help keep her accountable. They also help her parents with accountability. Asking helps us stay in the loop. - Malika
The most important things parents can do to support children in a self directed learning environment are ask questions, provide choices (vs demands) at home, and allow them to see us approach our own failures from a place of humility and curiosity (vs defeat and ego). If I had to pick *the* most important, it would be the bit about failure. - Kelly
“The most important thing for a parent to know about self-directed learning is that it calls for a reframing of what it means to support your child along their educational journey. It is a transition from ‘How was your day?’ to ‘What did you choose to do with your day today?’ It will require amplifying the voices of our kids and de-centering our own adult voices.” - Nikki
In my opinion the most important thing parents can do to support their children in a self directed learning environment is to trust the process. As difficult as it is to watch from the sidelines and sometimes see your children fail. It is important to allow them to have freedom within the guardrails of the program. I would also say it is important to encourage dialogue and communication along the way so you have a better understanding of your child’s learning style. - Jennifer
Be intentionally interested. Love, engage and support them in conversation about decisions they are making regarding their learning. - Gigi
Allow your child to struggle and allow them to take the lead on their future. Back off as a fixer and doer. - Matt
My two high schoolers are very independent. They don’t really require a lot from me, but I would say the most important thing a parent can do is to stay engaged with their student. I’m always asking how things are going, what’s new, what are you working on, how’s the assignment coming, etc. They know I’m always available if they do need help or to just talk through whatever they are working on. I think organization is also key in a self-directed learning environment. - Ann
I’ve found that we have a lot more success with our learners grabbing hold of their own learning when we ask “why” and “how” questions, rather than “what” questions. So we might start with “What did you do in Civilization today?”, although it’s almost always followed up with a “Wow, interesting, how do you feel about that?” Or, “Why do you think that topic is work exploring?” Sometimes they have to think really hard to come up with a legitimate answer, but we can tell it’s helping them take ownership over how they approach their education and why they believe what they believe. - Erika
The most important thing is to stop looking for perfection. Instead, take a step back and trust them to make mistakes and follow their instincts. This is necessary to help them build confidence. - Opal
All my kids are different. One needs very little support- just show him the goal line and he’ll get there faster than anybody. One needs daily goals to reach and one social reward picked by her: i.e. girls overnight trip away. One hates individualized attention and would rather be told in an email where he needs to focus or get extra online help. My youngest is navigating a self directed classroom and does need some 1-on-1 time (30 min) working on her goals at home after school. - Carmen
Create a support system that: 1) Rewards out of the box thinking, 2) Encourages a team approach to life (think about the whole system or “big picture”) when making decisions regardless of the impact or size of the decision, and 3) Continually highlight the value of the approach to the problem, situation, or conflict more than the result. I believe that this will help them to create a framework that eventually becomes a mental model that will help them for the rest of their life. - Luis
I think allowing your children to fail and learn from those failures is the most important thing you can do to help them in a self learning environment. - Kristin